Whenever there is a disaster or notable tragedy in the world, the conspiracy theorists come crawling out of their darkened dens to offer up incredibly implausible explanations. The worst one, of late, was in the wake of the Boston Marathon bombings. There was a theory going around, and widespread it was too, that the whole thing had been staged and all the folk who lost limbs were amputee actors. Really? Really? And the lone gunmen is almost always a CIA mind-controlled drone, activated by some remote control… and so on and so forth. We’ve all heard that it was George W. Bush who was behind the World Trade Centre holocaust.
I started snooping about the internet for others because although I’m often appalled at the incredulous nonsense, I am also fascinated by them. I’m fascinated to read fanatical rants that are so ‘out there’ that they become almost entertaining.
Here are a few doozies…
1. J Edgar Hoover organised a hit squad made up entirely of homosexuals to assassinate JFK. The rationale was that in the wake of the hit, police would disregard the flamboyantly dressed gay people because they would not be considered capable of committing such a violent act…I actually do think that the official story is a bit bogus but I’m not buying the Rainbow Army theory.
3. Sony Bono was murdered on the ski slope because he was going to run for president. Unlikely. He was probably just not looking where he was going.
4. Man did not walk on the moon. Man walked into a Hollywood studio for a photo shoot. I like to think we did walk on the moon. It looked like fun. I would like to move to Mars so walking on the moon seems like a good precursor for that. Also, if it was just a Hollywood stunt I would have thought they’d get ET in there. It was a bit too dull for a beat-up.
5. There is a New World Order running a global bank which aims to eliminate paper and coin currency in favour of digital banking and then one day in the not too distant future, they will shut down the system forcing citizens into slavery. It’s all about the Illuminati (isn’t it always?). This one is interesting. I like paper money. Particularly hundred dollar bills. I love the smell of money and I keep forgetting my online password. I will keep my money in shoe-boxes just in case. I have vivid nightmares about the Illuminati. They all have red hair!
6. According to Christine Fitzgerald, a former confidante of Princess Diana, the late Queen of Hearts told her quite seriously that the royal family are actually shape-shifting, reptilian aliens from a galaxy far, far away. Now that is gold.
- Five Kennedy Conspiracy Theories Debunked by JFK: The Smoking Gun (illuminutti.com)
- 10 things you might not know about conspiracy theories (illuminutti.com)
- 8 clues your friend is becoming a crazy conspiracy theorist (illuminutti.com)
- Who killed JFK? 50 years of conspiracy theories explained (theweek.co.uk)
- As Anniversary of JFK Death Nears, a Look at Conspiracy Theories (online.wsj.com)