by Gordon Bonnet via Skeptophilia
I didn’t realize what a fuss there still was over the sinking of the Titanic.
Okay, I know that it has some cachet as one of the biggest shipping disasters in history. I know it was made into a movie, with heartthrob Leonardo DiCaprio in the title role. (What, the movie isn’t named Jack Dawson’s Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Really Bad Day?) I know that the theme music, wherein Celine Dion’s heart goes on and on and on and on and on and on, was played an average of 1,389,910 times a day for a year after the movie opened.
But really: what’s the big deal? [spoiler alert] The ship sinks. Lots of people drown. End of story.
But no, that’s not all there is to it, some folks say — and by “some folks” I mean “people with the IQ of a bar of soap.” Because we haven’t discussed why the Titanic sank. And it wasn’t because it ran into a great big hunk of ice.
Oh, no, that would be way too logical.
You can forget about all of that. No iceberg necessary. According to a new theory, the Titanic sank because a bunch of time travelers from the future went back to witness the Titanic sinking from on board the ship itself, and the extra weight of the passengers is what caused the ship to sink.
Now, wait, you may be saying, at least after you recover from the faceplant you undoubtedly did after reading this novel claim. “If the time travelers are what caused it to sink, then how did anyone know it had sunk, since the ship had to sink in order for the time travelers to know to come back in time to watch it sink?”
Well, if you asked that question, all I can say is . . .